Thinkin' back...

This past Wednesday I visited my folks' graves. Thursday made 14 years since Mother died. It hit me really hard this year for some reason. A friend had brought a Gatorade bottle of sand and plastic bag of shells from the beach at Corpus Christi for my Mom's grave. (Mother grew up in Aransas Pass, Texas and had water from the Gulf runnin' through her veins.) Anyway, the sand & shells were way better than flowers and held much more meaning so I took off work and made the hour and a half drive south. It was a nice drive. Weather was gorgeous... Trees were beginnin' to turn... Not much traffic... Good music on the cd player... I did a lot o' thinkin'.

I reminisced about my parents on the way to the cemetery. I can't believe they've been gone 14 & 15 years. On the other hand, it gets harder and harder to remember certain things and I wonder sometimes if I'm having real memories or replaying something I've heard somebody else talk about. It's weird. There's been a lot of life happen since Mother and Daddy died. So many things they would have loved being a part of or seeing. There are nine new people in just our immediate family that never even saw my parents. And one more on the way. That whole circle of life thing is both upsetting and soothing.

Okay, I did most of my thinkin' on the drive home after the stress and emotion of the cemetery visit was over. I opened my eyes more and enjoyed the beauty of the day and the countryside. I don't know which thing causes fall color in trees but we don't have much of it this year. We had drought until this past month when we've had oodles of rain, and one of those things is necessary for reds and golds. But I still enjoyed the pretty browns mixed in with the evergreen pines. I always find it interesting that in less than an hour I go from mostly hardwood trees, and smaller trees, to the tall pines and the Davy Crockett National Forest.

I thought back to my youth and fall days when I would be in the last days of going barefooted - before Mother would holler at me as I ran out the door to put some shoes on. I remembered throwing a hackamore bridle and saddlepad on my horse and disappearing for hours as I rode her through barditches where there was still good grass on which to munch. (Um, for the horse, not me.) I'd lay back on that horse's back and stare at the sky while she grazed happily. If I wasn't on the horse I was probably riding my bicycle with a friend that lived down the rode. The days before 10-speed bikes when it took everything we had to pedal to the top of a hill just so we could coast back down with the wind in our hair, feet stuck out to the side so the pedals could spin as fast as they needed to. For a moment I missed my youth as badly as I miss my parents. I missed the time when my most major decision of the day was whether to ride the horse or the bike. When I felt so secure knowing that there was always someone at home taking care of everything I needed. When I knew that no matter what happened outside I would enter our house and know I was completely sheltered, completely cared for, and completely loved. No matter what. Knowing all those things gave me a type of confidence and peace that I no longer feel. Now, although I am still loved by my siblings and their kids, and I have a new type of confidence that comes with experience and age, I'm still looking for my own peace on my own terms. I think I'll eventually get there but, I gotta tell ya, it ain't today and it probably won't be tomorrow...

CeeCee Stories:

CeeCee's aunt is pregnant so there's been talk of babies and the baby in April's tummy, etc. CeeCee told her mommy last week that she has two babies in HER tummy and their names are James and Skookie. We don't know where she came up with "Skookie."

So my niece tells CeeCee that the new baby's name will be the same as Grandaddy's and Joe-Joe's and we're gonna call him Billy. CeeCee looked at her like she was "insame" [CeeCee's version of insane] and asked if we would have to call him "Friller" [CeeCee's version of "Thriller" which is what my nieces and nephews call their dad (my brother)]. I can't remember why the kids call their dad Thriller but it has nothing to do with MJ.

Y'all have a fun Halloween or Fall Festival - whatever y'all call it. My porch light will be OFF in order to look as uninviting as I can for trick or treaters. By the way, I noticed today that people on tv were calling it "tricks or treats." We say "trick or treat" down here. Well, it's more like "trickertreat."

P.S. I have temporarily deactivated my facebook page. I got real irritated with it this week when I realized I strongly don't give a shit what people do every few minutes. That's what I get for being "friends" with so many college kids.

Family funnies...

The discussion was about Halloween costumes and who would dress up as what. My niece was telling me about CeeCee's costume. CeeCee asked me what my costume would be. My niece interrupted me to tell her baby girl that Auntie intends to be a witch again this year, for the umpteenth year in a row. Niiiiiice...

My niece texted me the Texas A&M scores while I was at my school's football game. The entire Big 12 conference was in shock that my Fightin' Texas Aggies beat Texas Tech. My niece, when texting me the final score, added "I'm going to sports-cry!" [Definition: "sports-cry" refers to tears shed when one hears something sports related that moves them to tears. Can be happy or sad tears. Examples: the autistic kid that scored 21 points in the only game he ever played, Rudy, Brett Favre playing in a game the day his Dad died, the Aggies beating Texas Tech, etc.]

We recently learned my nephew & niece-in-law are expecting a baby boy in March. My nephew was telling us about the sonogram and how there was NO DOUBT it was a boy. Nephew says as soon as the little fella knew the camera was on him he mooned it, displaying clearly that he's all boy. My niece reminded us that this is a case of "like father, like son" as we used to pay Joe to moon people when he was a little boy. (I know - we're awful. But it sure made for some funny vacation moments.) So III will owe IV a quarter when he's born. [Note: If you wanna see my brother (Jr) tear up, talk about IV being born in his birthday month. Good stuff. Especially mention how incredibly proud Sr would be...]

Dog Communication...

Non-doglovers are rolling their eyes right about now. "Yeah. Suuuure. Dogs communicate? Pfft." Well, YEAH, they sure as hell do! They tell me when they're hungry, thirsty, need to go outside, want to be petted, when they don't like somethin'... Oh, and they tell me they love me everytime they look at me. Very nice. I dogsit the offensive coordinator's dog on Gameday every week. Brady (the dog) has the Houdini gene and has been able to escape his yard no matter what Coach does to the fencing. He could probably escape my yard if he wanted to - but with Timber, Nellie, food and water probably just doesn't feel the need to go anywhere. Last week when Coach dropped Brady off for his playdate at my house, he told me that Brady had been crazy-acting all morning and couldn't wait to get in the truck. I told him that after four weeks the dog has learned their Gameday behavior and knows he's coming to my house. Anyway, I texted Coach yesterday (Gameday) to tell him Chuck had repaired my fence picket so the yard was ready for Brady. Coach called and admitted he forgot the dog but felt it would be okay since it was a day game and they wouldn't be gone much longer than a regular work day. Here's our conversation:

Coach: No wonder Brady was acting crazy. He thought he was taking a trip to your house.
Me: It's a good thing you weren't Lassie's owner. Timmy would have drowned in the well. The miners never would have been found in the collapsed mine. All because you wouldn't have paid attention to Lassie's frantic messages!
Coach: True. I had a terrible time putting Brady in his kennel but I guess it's because he was expecting a trip.
Me: You have to go get him. He wants to come here AND it's part of our Gameday routine. You can't mess with Gameday Mojo.
Coach: Yeahhhh...

So Coach sent his brother to get Brady and drop him off. Then we won the football game. Timber, Nellie, and Brady played til they were worn out - and we all slept like rocks. Except Coach who is already worried about next week's game. Glad I'm not a coach.

I was sitting outside the fieldhouse yesterday when the guys came off the field following their warmup (before the game). I was greeted by numerous grins and lotsa hugs. Not a bad gig. I think I must look like Buddha (with hair and a shirt) so they have to touch me for luck. Ha!

During the game one of the defensive backs ran over to me and said, "MizAngie - WAIT HERE. I'm gonna run out there, stop this team from scoring, and then I'll be right back..." Me, "Okay, Joe. I'll be right here." What a sweet kid. GREAT personality. (Side note: This young man is raising a little girl as a single parent. While in school his mom is helping.) The defense was excited because they were actually stopping (for the most part) the other team's offense. That hasn't been the case all season. Ha! Luckily our offense is having a fabulous year so we're 4-2 on the season. With one more conference win we'll clinch a playoff spot. Go US!

Okay, my dryer buzzed - gotta go hang up my clothes. Y'all have a good week!

I met a blog buddy and nothing bad happened...

I told some friends and family that I was going to meet a blogger-buddy from NYC in person and the general reaction was something to the effect of "I hope you don't get killed or kidnapped or anything." I guess it's easy to see how I got my suspicious nature as it obviously runs in the family and attracts like kind. I assured everyone that it was scheduled for a public place, in the daylight, and I was taking backup (Carrie & CeeCee). We had a fabulous time! I met Mannyed (Gina), The Husband, and The Friend. I told Gina later that it felt like I was visiting with an old friend whom I hadn't seen in a long time, as opposed to meeting someone brand new. There were no awkward silences, disagreements, or strange looks (unless I just didn't catch them!). My Daddy said one time that I seldom meet a stranger - maybe not. I look forward to future visits.

Now, this is weird...last year I was supposed to meet Gina in Dallas but a tree fell on my house doing quite a bit of damage so obviously I didn't get to go to Dallas. Monday morning, the morning I was scheduled to go to Dallas to meet Gina, a big-ass oak tree in my back neighbor's yard split and fell knocking out my power for half a day. I left Timber and Nellie in the house knowing my friend would check on them later, packed my clothes, and went to Dallas anyway. I changed clothes at my niece's house and we met Gina and her posse. I was determined to go this time and I couldn't BELIEVE another damn tree fell. Who would believe that story anyway? "Uh, yeah, everytime I plan a trip to meet you a tree falls..." Not likely - but it really did!

It's autumn again. We had a week of fall, then summer again, now we're back to fall. It's been rainy and cool...and fabulous! I think I saw a gold leaf, although it coulda been brown. Most leaves are still green. The high tomorrow is supposed to be 70 degrees - nice & cool for football! And fall baseball. And volleyball. And soccer. Last week's football game was cool and it misted the whole game. The cheerleaders committed an abomination by leaving before halftime. I heard the cheerleader "coach" has been stripped of most of his responsibilities as a result of his decision to leave the game vs our archrival from 25 miles down the road that ended in a TJC victory in 2OT (double overtime). In Texas this would equate to the Pope leaving in the middle of mass; or the vice-president walking out of the president's State-of-the-Union address; or Gayle King not listening to all of Oprah's ah-ha moment. You know - BIG stuff! What was that guy THINKING???

I have fall fever. I don't want to do anything but stay home and do the things I do there, like...nothing. Ha! A lot of people I know hurry through chores/tasks so they can get them outta the way then have more time to do other stuff. Not me. What's the rush? The quicker my living room gets cleaned, the quicker it's gonna get messy again and then I'd have to clean it twice instead of once. See my logic? My goal is to clean annually. Hahahaha!!

I hope y'all have a good weekend. I plan on it.

Later...

My name is Angie and it's been 10 days since my last blog...

Health Care Reform: There are no incentives for politicians, physicians, insurance companies, or pharmaceuticals to reform healthcare in this country. We make a lot more money for the people listed if we remain fat, out-of-shape, and sickly. Politicians receive a lot of money from individuals and lobbying groups representing doctors, insurance, and drug companies. A LOT of money. To make too many changes in healthcare would be cutting the bottom out of their campaign purses. So, I don't look for many changes. Congress will throw some money out there for some programs that will waste more money than it will help people who can't afford insurance coverage. They'll pat each other on the back, and then deposit the campaign funds the big business guys of medicine send them. I know, I'm VERY cynical, but I know that rhetoric is driving this bus and money will send it back to the garage.

Work Story: Yesterday two soccer coaches walked into my office, one confident in the statement he just made - the other laughing at him. I had to know what was happenin', of course. One male coach told the other that if he's wearing a dri-fit (kinda slinky-feeling) shirt and it gets damp then it feels like someone is licking his nipple. I said, "Really? Then I want a dri-fit shirt and a spritz bottle."

Work Story #2: The baseball team is quite friendly with the women's soccer team. I don't know how it's workin' out for the baseball guys but the soccer girls are enjoying the group of guys who paint themselves up and cheer loudly at their games. It's funny. Last night I brought a big bag of cheap-ass candy/gum for the guys. I was sitting on the opposite side of the field from the baseball guys. I saw my messenger, the baseball trainer, deliver the bag of goodies. Saw all the bodies leaning in to grab a handful of candy. And then, to my embarrassment, I hear them chanting "We love MizAngie. We love MizAngie." Good grief. While slightly embarrassing, it was also oddly sweet. Ha! Not quite as special as the time the marching band stood in my front yard playing "Happy Birthday" but still very special.

Exciting news: Mannyed is visiting Dallas and I'm going up there to meet her. Suh-weet! This will be my first in-person meeting of a blogger-buddy. I'm nervously excited. What if she thinks I'm a goober? ACK!

Weather: We got us a gully-washer goin' today. Lots o' rain. I stayed home so I could enjoy the cooler, rainy day in my pajamas. Yesterday it was 90 degrees. Today it's 70. *sigh* I've always heard Texans say, "Welllll, if you don't like the weather in Texas then just hang around a few minutes and it'll probably change." I heard somebody from elsewhere say that the other day and I thought they were silly because, well, I've always thought that was a uniquely Texas statement. Maybe I should get out more...

Holy Shit: There's a bird in my house. I wish I had a cat because I have no idea how I'm gonna get this thing outta here. Guess I'll open the front door and see what happens.

Y'all have a good day. I'm gonna slide back into the living room to the couch. I loves me a good ol' rainy day at home.

Holidays and sports...

Yesterday the NY Yankees moved the start time of their game with Boston back because Yom Kippur began at 6:00 pm last night and they wanted to be finished in time to start the Jewish holiday. I don't mean to sound anti-semitic, but WHY? I mean, most important Christian holidays are covered up with football and basketball games. Hakeem Alojuwan of the Houston Rockets used to play during Ramadan even though he couldn't eat. So, I'm not against honoring the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur AT ALL, I just wonder why other religions don't get the same consideration.

I'm torn. I have some guilt about not adequately honoring my own Christian holidays, but I enjoy the heck out of opening presents on Christmas Day and then piggin' out while I watch "The NBA on Christmas Day" doubleheader. But I do feel sorry for those athletes and people working the games, as well as the tv people, who don't get to spend the holiday with their families. I guess, technically, Thanksgiving isn't classified as a Christian holiday since anyone can be thankful. However, we end up making it a Christian holiday as we pray for our Aggies or our Cowboys to win - and oh yeah, we're thankful for all our blessings.

Several years ago the University Interscholastic League (UIL) in Texas made holiday rules so that gung-ho coaches couldn't schedule practices and competitions on the day before, the day of, or the day after a major holiday. Or on Sunday, I think. I don't know what happens if you're caught cheating, but I know there is some cheating because some people are idiots about this sort of thing.

I guess what bothers me the most is that we, as a society, don't honor much of anything anymore. Malls and liquor stores are open all the time; holidays have become just another opportunity for a sale. Families don't seem to spend as much time together - holiday or no. It's sad for me as I remember our holiday and Sunday evening family times when we weren't allowed to have other kids over or go anywhere. It was a time for family to either reflect on the meaning of a holiday, or just to regroup as a family and reconnect. Period. By my teen years such practice made me feel deprived but, looking back, I cherish those times and those memories.

Ouch...

Well, my sweet little ol' football team got their asses handed to 'em on a plate last night in a tough, tough game. Our defense sucked a big green wienie and they had 500+ yards of offense on us. Horrible. Just horrible. And not only THAT, but the locker room was tiny. When I attend our football games I stay on the sideline. Our fieldhouse at home is big with a big toilet area with lots of stalls and urinals. So, while the team is on the field I usually go into our locker room to pee. It's a little bit yechy but not much different than the ladies room at the mall. Last night I needed to pee so I waited until after halftime, after the team left the locker room, and went in to pee while the trainers cleaned up. There were only two stalls and, I gotta say, our guys had horrible aim. Luckily, since it had been raining earlier, I had tucked an old towel in my purse to dry off the stadium seating and it came in real handy cleaning off the toilet seats. I was in one stall, Denny in the other, when we heard one of the male trainers heading in. The female trainer said he'd have to wait because MizAngie was "in there." The kid groaned and said, "MizAngie HURRY - I gotta PEEEEEE." So I told him to pee. I came out of the stall and the kid sure enough was standing as far into a urinal as he could get. He said, "I never thought I'd be lookin' at MizAngie while I peed." I just laughed, washed my hands, and left. When ya gotta go, ya gotta go.

This week at one of our high schools, a kid took a kitchen knife to school with him. He turned in his homework and then shoved the knife in his teacher's chest. Nobody knows why the kid did it. The kid may not even know why. He has a history of violence and mental illness, yet there he was in public school. Another teacher tackled the student wielding the knife before he could hurt anyone else, and held him down until police arrived on the scene. We're not talking about a school located in a huge urban area known for crime, drugs, or gang violence. We're talking about a 5A high school in East Texas. The teacher had recently told his brother that he loved teaching. He knew it was "his calling." He cared very much for his students, for the process of learning and teaching. And now he's dead. Anybody still think teachers are overpaid?

Later.